The end of my holiday... almost

I went to see Hal Gamgee the next morning. He, his friend (who kept dropping apple peels in my hair!), and I had a pleasant chat about the many places that we all had seen. Then Hal mentioned some rangers he knew that were stationed to the north, near Lake Evendim. He was concerned about how they were faring.

My conscience, which had begun to gnaw away at me a while ago, took a mighty bite now! I knew what the rascal was up to, of course. He was hoping that I would check in on them. I realized that now was the time to renew my struggle, such that it is, against the darkness and shadow. I clasped Hal on the shoulder and said I would start making my way up there that day. He and his friend were so happy that they even let me eat some apples with them, instead of just wearing them!






I figured the rangers would have much for me to do once I arrived, so I knew I had this one last journey to myself. Why not make the most of it, I thought. North of Oatbarton, I found a field of dazzling golden wildflowers and spent far too long there dancing in the sun and taking in their fragrance and the surrounding beauty. My energy gone for a bit, I collapsed amongst them and gazed into the bluest of skies, rays of sunshine cascading all around me.


My heart was healed, my spirit renewed. It was another example of the cycles of life, I realized. Facing the darkness and shadow of the world will always bring one down eventually, if they have no rest or respite from it. It will always be a process to heal from the wounds and fatigue that such a life will inevitably place upon you. Is there anyone living among us who truly has no limit to the burden they can bear? I cannot believe so, not even amongst the most noble of the rangers, not even their captain.

Learning one's limits is a most important part of self-discovery and vital to life itself. I thought of Aggy and how we held fast on the Trestlebridge, turning back the orcs. I hope that she has found some rest, as I have. I realize now that I had bent quite a bit under the burden I had carried and came far closer to my breaking point than I had imagined. I took a moment to give thanks for all those of stronger will who are able to bear so much more than I can.

Then the thought came into mind that, since I am able to bear so little compared to these, why bother with the smallest of wars that I wage? I could, after all, stay here and make a life for myself.


I buried my face in the wildflowers, feeling the warm grass beneath me and the sunshine hot on my neck...

Kaleigh